Music, Money, a Giveaway and Shameless Self-Marketing

Well, there’s no getting around it, I’m behind on posting. The only excuse I can offer is that saying “yes” makes you pretty darn busy. Plus it’s South by South West here in Austin. If you don’t know what that is, let’s put it this way, when the live music capital of the world decides to throw a music festival, people show up. Innovators, film makers, corporations, and musicians known and unknown, but pretty universally bad ass, fill the streets downtown with music.

For my part, I’ve decided to say “yes” to whoring myself out for corporate promotion. Despite the very nice paychecks involved in promotional work this month, I should confess my disappointment at taking this work.  I need the money after a move across the country, very much so.  But I was convinced that I’d land a performance gig for SXSW.  Since I didn’t, despite some valiant guerilla approaches to event spaces and a couple of musicians themselves, I took my actual income producing opportunities with a sigh and an open-minded “yes.”

And, in just a few short weeks, I’ll have modeled for Treaty Oak Photography (and a Burning Man costume maker), represented the city of Austin, the movie Spring Breakers, Ray Ban, and Reese’s at the MTV Woodie Awards. And I’ll walk away with $1000+, a motorcycle license, more reusable bags than I’ll ever need, a bellyache from too much chocolate, more new portfolio photos, having seen Tegan and Sara live, and hopefully this sweet pair of Ray Ban Wayfarers.  Oh, and I guess I’m in a commercial this Sunday at 8pm during the MTV Woodie Awards.

http://www.treatyoakphotography.com

Spring Breakers Austin Premier

http://www.BringItAustin.com, http://stasilli.wix.com/photography

Spring Breakers Austin Premier, South by South West in Pussy Riot-esque Unicorn Ski Mask

Ray Ban’s Envision Campaign, South by South West, with Square205

Ray-Ban’s Envision Campaign

http://www.SockItToMe.com, Best Socks Ever!

http://www.thebos.co, Reese’s and MTV Woodie Awards, loved Tegan and Sara!

More importantly, brand ambassadorship and promotional modeling are becoming the perfect freelance work for a busy performer and writer, with very few bars or nightclubs involved!  It’s mostly laid back and fun (with a noticeable correlation between high pay/respect/fun and low pay/disrespect/shit gig), and it turns out: a pretty sweet way to learn about marketing myself as well.

Catch me on the streets of Austin today and tomorrow (in costume), representing the Fire Trapeze and yours truly!  Follow me on Twitter and tweet @Erinina or #FireTrapeze today or tomorrow and I’ll be giving one lucky tweeter a copy of my Fire and Circus arts and writings book for free!  Afterall, if I’m not willing to give as much energy to self promotion as I do for a 1-3 day gig for some already rich corporation, then who should?

So what else have I been saying “yes” to? Well, it seems only appropriate during the live music festival of the year, to mention that I’m saying “yes” to music in my life.  I started a morning singing ritual back in the Happiness Project, making up silly songs for Evie, mostly. And that habit seems to have blossomed into full on singing at any and all times of the day. So, probably that means I’m saying “yes” to looking like an idiot most of the time too. C’est la vie. <=^.^=>

I’m also learning to play the violin/fiddle, thanks to a handsome music man here in Austin.  The violin (which I’ve always loved) and a handsome musician is pretty good motivation to do well in my world.  ;)  So far I can play an A scale and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.  Look out Julliard, here I come.  Soon I’ll also have my clarinet back from storage, and I’d better start practicing because friends are asking me to play.  We’ll see how fast I can overcome 15 years off of regular practice.

I guess the point is, that I didn’t realize how much New York had dampened my love for music until I arrived here. You couldn’t beg me to go to see live music in NYC. Seriously, I’m pretty sure my girl Liz literally begged me on a number of occasions. The prospect filled me with shuddering visions of dark, cramped loft spaces with too many drunk kids with attitudes puking in the bathroom and spilling their beer on you while they attempted to grind on your ass if you dared to actually dance.  Jump to Texas, where they actually ask you to dance (and it’s the two-step, or even better, the two-step with a dubstep/hip hop beat), and everyone dances and laughs and it’s beautiful outside.  This part I like about Texas.  It’s hard not to imagine music coming back into my life here.

Classical Music Mugs at http://www.cafepress.com

http://www.brianmicklethwait.com

http://www.mostwallpaper.com

Yes Humility, I See You There, You Can Come Out Now.

So, now that I’m not in crazy New York mode, it may be time to reevaluate how I approach situations and people. It just may be that the “I deserve to be paid more, revered, and sought after for my awesomeness,” no matter how true, isn’t the way to make friends and influence people.

Austin has been teaching me that getting a job isn’t that easy.  That getting paid gigs isn’t that easy.  That being the newbie is fun and everyone is welcoming, but friends don’t pay the rent.  Starting over is harder than I thought and the life lessons that I may have been avoiding learning in the NYC rat race aren’t always the most fun things to deal with.  Seeing ourselves and our imperfections in the mirror never is, I suppose.

What I do know is that since opening up to the concept of humility, letting people in who I might have judged unworthy of my “precious time” before (which in NYC was pretty much everyone because there is no time), I’ve found that very often, my judgements are incorrect.  People surprise me.  Often even surpass the impossibly high expectations I seem to set for myself and everyone around me.

And something I didn’t expect has begun to happen.  When I assume that everyone else has something to teach me, they generally do.  They also open up more.  And when I see their strengths and their weaknesses, I have more compassion for their weaknesses.  Which allows me to have more compassion for my own struggles and weaknesses.

All from a little humility…huh, I’ll keep working on it.

 

 

Challenge Check Back

I know you’re all clamoring to know how my challenge from last week went. So, here’s the quick recap. How are your challenges and resolutions going? Tell me in the comments!!

Bad Habit 1: Snapping at my boyfriend.

Not surprisingly, a few days of complementing and appreciating the man not only resulted in me actually appreciating him and feeling less irritated, but also seems to have resulted in an increase in sweetness back from him. I love when he cooks for me!! ;)

Bad Habit 2: Drinking (wine or otherwise) to relax at night.

When I can remember, deep stretching really is far more relaxing and likely to help me fall asleep happy. Especially since tequila and gin are really a bit more stimulating than relaxing in the first place. I still love wine, but not for every night. Luckily, a band of fellow trapeze teachers have adopted me into their all day working out clan, so I’m pretty guaranteed to have at least three nights a week enforcing my new habit.  Who says life doesn’t give you what you ask for?

http://www.lovingmycats.com

Bad Habit 3: Not answering the phone.

Okay, so luckily, I can ease into this one because I’ve been so bad at answering the phone for so long that not that many people call me. They know text is best. Still, I did get to hear the news that my girl from high school is pregnant in her own voice, instead of on Facebook. Pretty awesome! But I cheated on this one too. I still say “no” to talking to bill collectors. I’ll call them back once I have a job and a plan.

http://www.cats.about.com

Bad Habit 4: Judging people on first impressions.

Alright, I’m working on this one. I really didn’t realize how competitive and manipulative NYC was until dealing with people here. Those are traits I associate with Hollywoodian LA’ers. New Yorkers are more real, right? But, the thing that’s refreshing and confusing about TX so far is that people may generally like me without ulterior motives and that I am more of a pretentious networker than I ever imagined. Go figure.

http://www.hipsterkitty.com

Bad Habit 5: Don’t spend money on/acquire excess junk.

Since I’m officially dead broke and waiting for an only potential job to start in two weeks, this has been pretty easy. Can’t spend money that you don’t have unless you have a credit card, which I do not. But, I also have not had a chance to get to my storage unit and throw things out yet either. Soon…

So, there’s the check in. Overall, a quite successful challenge!

This week I’m saying “yes” to shameless self promotion in the hopes of landing some great trapeze gigs (and money) asap.

http://www.havenhumane.net

Saying Yes to a Challenge!

So, thanks to 29toLife, for offering this challenge on their blog, which according to the year of “yes,” I now must accept.  The challenge: Replace 5 bad habits with 5 good habits for one week and report back the results.  Okay, doesn’t sound so hard right?

Yeah, well…if it were easy, I probably wouldn’t have these bad habits in the first place right?  Okay, so let’s see.  It’s Monday…beginning of the week…so what should we work on this week?

Bad Habit 1: Snapping at my boyfriend, Replacement Habit: Complimenting him

Bad Habit 2: Drinking wine to relax at night, Replacement Habit: Deep, contortion stretching

Bad Habit 3: Not answering the phone, Replacement Habit: Answering the phone

Bad Habit 4: Judging people on first impressions, Replacement Habit: Say hello to people, smile

Bad Habit 5: Spending on, or acquiring stuff I don’t need, Replacement Habit: Donate, throw away or trade something everyday, remove one bag of stuff from storage unit

This is, of course, in addition to my new ‘schedule’ of working (writing/looking for jobs) every weekday morning/afternoon and training my body daily.  Otherwise known as spending a FT schedule on my art and seeing what happens, since I don’t have a job yet anyways. ;)

Alright. See you this weekend guys!

http://www.sodahead.com

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Hey guys, time to shout out your favorite peeps in the blogosphere!

Creative Dreamers

As the blogger behind Creative Dreamers, I only think it is right to acknowledge and showcase some of the best blogs out there. So, based on the opinions of CD readers, and the wonderful work of others out there contributing to the ever growing blogisphere, I’m announcing the first ever Creative Dreamers Blog Awards.

Here’s how it’s all going to come together

Blog Awards will be given based on the categories below:

Favorite Photography Blog

Favorite Poetry Blog

Favorite Visual Design or Layout on a Blog

Favorite General Arts Blog

Favorite Drawing Blog

Favorite Subculure and Body Art Blog

Favorite Music or Video Blog

The categories should probably be pretty self explanatory but if you’re not sure where a blog might fit in, just ask.

Readers can nominate any blog of their choice by:

1. Liking this post.

2. Sending the URL of your nomination, along with the category you…

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I Don’t Want To!!!

So, here it is.  I want to say no.  I want to scream no!  I have no money in the bank, owe some friends money still from the move, owe a lot of creditors money (story of the rest of my life!), and still am literally dragging my reluctant little (okay, not so little) butt, kicking and screaming, to bars with my resume.  This very well may be what the year of saying yes is for.  To push me past my excuses, my blocks, my comfort zones.  But I just don’t want to bartend anymore!!!!!

It doesn’t help that around the corner are very, very positive performance gigs, aerial teaching opportunities, and even a chance to be a Zipline tour guide, while living my life out as a writer and artist in my quietly, less-expensive, Texas existence.  So why should I pile on the edgy makeup, don my cutest Rockabilly duds and flirt with bar managers for a job I really, really don’t want?  Because those magical jobs are around the corner.  Coming up in the next couple of weeks or months.  And my money is gone now.

So, its time to either book some more gigs, tuck my tail between my legs and fly to NYC for a week of emergency, soul-sucking club work, or get a side job asap.  Or all of the above.  So, my stubborn not-so-little butt needs to start saying “yes.”  After all, who’s to say I won’t rekindle my love for slinging drinks in a smaller, cooler town than NYC?  Maybe it will open up other doors… Or maybe my whole body resistance to the job is a sign that I should say “no?”  Oh man, I don’t know.  Well, I guess the only solution is to try saying “yes” if a job opens up and to also try like hell to get something I’d rather do sooner in order to forestall having to don my blacks and mix you a Mexican Martini.

But, this resistance isn’t limited to the bar issue.  I also notice that people have been offering me artistic opportunities in spades, and while I’ve trained my outer persona to nod, “yes” that sounds very interesting!  My inner monologue is going, “do you have time for that?” “Is that helping your career progress?” “Are these the people you want to work with?” “Do you even like that kind of thing?”  These are the questions that NYC artistic living has drilled into my brain.  And they are very useful questions, in their time and place.

However, in a year of saying “yes,” they are stumbling blocks, hiccups of hesitation and self doubt.  The whole point of a year of “yes” is to jump on opportunity and surprise myself with where it leads me.  So, I’ve auditioned with a burlesque troop, started studying fiddle, have plans to start playing clarinet and composing music again, and hopefully in a month will be trading tap lessons for trap lessons!  That’s pretty exciting and totally outside of the realm of what I could have envisioned and directed for myself.  But having to constantly push a vision and a direction for myself might be more of a thing of my NYC past.  Only time will tell.

Moral of the story?  Maybe if the whole world is different here in Austin, if saying “yes” to silks, music and burlesque troops is so great, then bartending will be too.  And if not, well, we don’t want all roses and rainbows for stories anyways, do we?  How boring.  ;)

Results Inconclusive

I hate to under whelm you my dear readers with my less than conclusively, spectacular results from these first two weeks. But I suppose that’s to be expected from any new beginning.  To be honest, like any new dieter, gym rat, spiritual zealot, or general turn-over-a-new-leafer; there have been obstacles.  Like, no matter how hard I tried on the 8 day road trip to Austin; the cranky, bitchy, intolerant Erinina kept rearing her snippy little head.  It’s a testament to my main squeeze that it wasn’t worse, not that I expect that he’d believe that.  And well, sometimes I just plain forget that I’m supposed to be saying “yes.” Especially when an opportunity presents itself early in the morning. Then when the alarm goes off, all I want to say “yes” to is five more hours of sleep.

But there have been some positive moments too. And little reminders (like this Yoko Ono mug that I happened to spot yesterday in Marfa, TX right before our show) to help me keep on track.

In fact, the agreement to get back in a car for the gig in West Texas, 8 hours away from Austin, in just a little over a week after my week long trek out here from NYC is a fine example of saying “yes.” And because of it, I had the privilege of meeting some of the most amazing, artistic and genuinely lovely people; some great leads on future performances and collaborations, and I remarkably returned to Austin refreshed and ready to rock, as opposed to the exhausted and cranky you’d expect after being on tour and sleeping on couches for four days. All I have to say is if you ever have a chance to get to Terlingua and Marfa…take it. There’s magic there.

I think my biggest initial success with the “yes” project though, has been in saying “yes” to taking the time to get to know people past my first impressions. While some people have proven that those warning flags in that initial first impression were valid, generally there has been surprise and delight in the sincerity and openess of the people I’ve met. It’s probably a tribute to Texans, as much as evidence that I’m on the right path in my life, that people actually are interested in getting to know me, and not just because they want something from me. How refreshing!

The Parameters of Kicking, Whining, Crying, and Hissing My Way Through a Year of Saying “Yes”

Well, we’ve said goodbye to 20-12 and all of it’s magical, earth-shattering, mind-bending forces of change.  And here in Erinina Land, we’re welcoming 2013 with a big bang of our own. We spent the last days of the year packing a moving truck, performing a last mega New Year’s Eve in NYC with no other than Moby (yeah, that Moby), and then in the wee days of 2013, we began a week-long road trip to Austin, TX.  [In fact, I wrote this post originally as planned on January 2nd.  Apparently, we are having technical difficulties…because here I am editing it in draft form on January 11th.  Well, I’m saying “yes” to pushing ahead through mistakes too.  Convenient, eh?]  I am heading west in hopes of a better life, as our forefathers also did.  After all, “there are no Taxes in Texas, and the streets are paved in gold” or something like that*.

So, as I have obsessively been mentioning on multiple social media platforms (like I know what I’m doing), this year also marks my year-long commitment to  saying “yes” to what the world offers to me, and to what my deepest version of my truest self desires.  So what does that hippie sounding, new age weirdness mean exactly? Well, let’s lay out the parameters, shall we?

For a girl who spent quite a few years in NYC learning how to stand up for herself and say “no,” as well as quite a few years before that (all her life), honing her own stubborn Viking traits; it seems time to take that knowledge and you know, try something a little different.  I could become a grumpy old stick in the mud, who knows what she likes, gosh darnit.  Or, it could be time to try on things that I might automatically reject because I think I know better, or because some deep subconscious mind is scared, or even just to listen more deeply, not just to myself (but god forbid), other people, who might have great lessons to impart.  Like, maybe I could listen to someone who could teach me to stop writing super long, run-on sentences, like that last one.  Just Maybe.  Or actually, “yes, I will.”

I fear that over time, I’ve reverted to the two-year-old, protesting just to assert my own control and power.  But, what opportunities am I missing in my stubborn, drag my heels, “don’t tell me what to do, I know what’s best for me, and what I like, and where I’m going” mentality? Do I really always know whats best for me?  Likely not.  Unless, we’re talking about the part of me that requires deep peace and quiet, or disciplined meditation in order to be heard above all the stubborn Ego Erinina-isms.

Alright, alright.  So, that’s the basic why.  And my previous post discusses the serendipitous steps that brought me to this epiphany of saying “yes.”  Now, let’s set some parameters.  How do I say “yes,” and when?  Because, well, sorry to say, creepers…but the year of saying yes does not mean you can hit on me and I’ll just say “yes, whatever you want.”  Nope, nope, nope.  That’s not how it works.  Here’s how it works:

1. When the Universe (or you know, just a person in it) presents an opportunity that will not jeopardize my health, sanity, or predetermined goals for the year; I will say “yes.”

2. When my deepest, truest self sings to me to follow, or ties my stomach in knots with warning; I will say “yes, I am listening,” and take the necessary steps to stay on the path that is right and safe for me.  I will also not use fear as an excuse, since I have spent enough time listening to myself to know the difference between a fear that means, “yes, go forward” and a knot in my stomach that says “don’t let this psycho kill you.”

3. When I must say “no” to someone, I will say so in a way that validates them and their invitation, by saying “Yes, but that is not for me” or “Yes, but I cannot do that right now.”  Unless they are total creepers.  Then, I get to say “yes” to totally telling them that they’re a creeper.  Because my deepest, truest self can be a little sassafras.

4. I say “yes” to failure and learning.  I am already failing and saying “no” out of habit and doing the kicking and screaming against change that is in my nature.  I expect pitfalls.  I say “yes, bring them on.”  At least this blog will be more interesting for y’all.  I mean, trust me, next week’s post is already full of me ‘effing this whole thing up.  Read on, my trusty followers.  This is likely to be one interesting tug of war between my ego and my super ego and, well, you know, just the everyday shit of life.  Sorry mom, but I’m also saying “yes” to swearing.  I swear.  Like a sailor.  Someday, I want to be a sailor.  Makes sense, I guess.

Alright, alright.  I think that is enough for now.  Parameters set.  We can always add amendments later.  After all, if the founding fathers can’t get the constitution right on the first try, cut me some slack.  I’m just a blog writer people.

 

*You’re supposed to sing this quote to the song, “There Are No Cats in America” from An American Tail.  Also, from what I can tell so far…there are just as many taxes in Texas as there were cats in America.  Go Figure.

New Year’s Resolutions

My resolution is not to mess up my performance with Moby on my last night in New York City.  New Year’s Eve.  Eek!

What’s yours?